Sometimes I wish there wasn't so many things that needed me or my attention!
I would like to give my baby all my attention and just play with her and hang out with friends and also give myself a little TLC...but there is always so much to be done! I've been trying to think lately what I can eliminate from my work load...nothing! Unless of course I decide to give up showering, and doing my hair and makeup, which I am just not ready to do quite yet. Maybe when I have 2 or more kids I will be forced to be a frumpy housewife (no offense to anyone).
Caroline takes the majority of my time which seems to be spent on the couch while she is attached to my boobs...or on the changing table! I feel like a cow sometimes, but I'm happy she is getting the best food. When she is sleeping or otherwise happy there is always something that needs to be cleaned up (I seem to have OCD because I just can't take it when the house is messy and things are out of place).
Then, it seems like we always need food or something from the grocery store. This sometimes takes more trips then usual because my sweet baby starts crying in the middle of the store. The other day she started crying when I was in the checkout line, and I just left. I couldn't take all the people staring at me, probably thinking "why can't she keep her baby quiet", and the old lady behind me who decided it was her business to tell me my baby was hungry...which she wasn't!
Week after week I lug 3 large baskets of laundry to the laundry mat...now with baby in tow...do you know how hard that is? Luckily today she was an angel and slept the whole time. I need a house with a washer and dryer!
On top of this there is church, which I hate to put on the back burner, but it seems like I have to. I'm in the primary presidency and I'm sure they could use my help, but I really don't know how much help I can be. Tom works on Sunday a lot (he works A LOT in general)...how am I going to help in primary with a baby? I mean, what if she needs to eat right in the middle of my lesson?
And despite there being so much to do...it's so lonely doing it alone with no adult to talk to. If I was rich I would hire a nanny to be my friend and do my shopping, cleaning, and laundry.
Next there is my brain...I seem to have lost it. I can't remember anything! If you find it, please let me know!
Maybe I will get the hang of this motherhood thing soon...let's hope. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE being a mother and being with my baby...I just wish sometimes that there wasn't so much to do!
Thanks for reading...any ideas from you mothers out there? Everyone keeps telling me when Caroline is 3 months old it will get easier...hmm...let's hope so...but if not, she is sooo cute, and that's enough to make me smile! : )
A Loving Story (as told by Maureen)
11 years ago
13 comments:
I know you've already heard it, but I'll just reaffirm - it does get easier. There's not even a set age (although 3 months is probably about right) but eventually they're just able to last longer between feedings and handle life better in general. On top of that, you'll get to the point that you adjust to having to lug a baby everywhere and hearing her cry while waiting in the checkout line :-)
Yes, it does get easier, especially when you start getting more sleep. Everything is easier to handle. Although sometimes I think back to those first few months and wish I could have them back. Cuddling with my new, fresh smelling baby, staying in PJs all day, and sitting all day to nurse. Now I am constantly running after a toddler, pulling him out of messes, hoping he will take a nap instead of climb out of his crib, and ducking my head when he starts screaming or throwing things in the grocery store. Every stage has its ups and downs, but you do get the hang of things. Going out and juggling your day gets easier. Crying bothers you less, and so do other peoples negative opinions. I know that you are a great mother. Listen to your heart, and it will come naturally. I know its hard, but try not to worry about the little things. Life will be messy for awhile. Just wait until their clothes are a mess from food, dirt, water, whatever, it drove me crazy in the beginning. Find someone at church that you trust to hold Caroline while you teach, and try a baby carrier (I suggest the Ergo) at the store and at church. Braden was much happier being close to me than strapped in his car seat. Good luck, love you Sarah. I know I am thousands of miles away, but you can always call!
You know I wish I could say that it will all get back to normal, but here I am over a year later still trying to find that balance. Something I learned recently- which I wish I had let go of sooner- is that I had to stop being so OCD. I mean, I make sure the house is sanitary...but I have to just let things go sometimes. It's a good lesson to learn early on. These moments are hard...I remember...but they are also wonderful. I know a million people have told you to soak up every second of this time because it flies. Well it REALLY does! Also, I agree about a baby carrier. I had a sling for her and would put it on her while I wiped down the counters or just did odd jobs around the house...and especially when we went shopping. Good luck. It's hard, but SO worth it! :)
welcome to the night shift! jk....nursing is great and yes all you do is nurse. grab a good book and enjoy. don't give up. you can do it! GOOD LUCK
welcome! I like losing of the brain part the most...more of it gets lost with each child ;) I begin to see why plural marriage would be a good thing...hey, you'd have someone to help with the laundry!
When they start sleeping more and eating faster it will get easier. I now have two and some how I've managed to stay fairly frump free, so don't worry too much. :) It also gets easier because you start to care less about what other people think and more about just how to get through the day. Know that everything isn't going to get complete in one day and that sitting in pajamas on the couch is okay. Once your baby girl starts walking around you'll miss those cuddle moments.
Yes Sarah--it does get easier when you get more sleep! Sleep is WONDERFUL! I wouldn't worry about too much about the crying in the store--yours won't be the first (or last) baby to cry...and at least right now she's pretty quiet! Give her some time and she'll be able to really make some noise! ;)
And I wouldn't worry too much about the frumpy--you are naturally beautiful, so you already have an advantage there--make sure you're showered, but you'll still look good if you haven't done your hair and makeup!
Congrats Sarah--she's beautiful! And, when it gets too crazy lugging the laundry let Tom take a turn with it...there are plenty of 24 hour laundry mats!
And DAIRY BARN has cheap eggs, milk & bread...which is enough to live on, and is DRIVE THROUGH for those days where baby isn't in the mood to shop!
I used to wonder how I would be able to handle babies, work, housework, and church responsibilities. I have now learned that no matter what, family comes first, and somehow everything else will fall in place. It's easier to say than do, but keep doing it, and it will get easier! There's a poem about motherhood that my mother used to say. I don't remember all of it, but the ending goes like this - "quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep, I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep." Enjoy this year with your baby, and don't worry about all the other things so much.
Hey you! I have been thinking about you lately! Give me a call--we need to catch up and just chat! Love you to bits!
love,
Your frumpy housewife friend :-) (haha you are so funny! I decided that without a husband around during the week, I need some serious motivation to do hair and makeup. hence, we need to chat and you can give me some motivation!)
Hey Sarah, I totally understand being overwhelmed. I wished I could tell you that it will go away. But you know what, it doesn't. It does get easier but I've decided life with children is overwhelming most of the time. You'll have really hard days and other days that seem like nothing to it. Just take life one day at a time and you'll do great. I don't know how you do laundry going somewhere with a baby. I had to go to a laundry mat when we were first married and I hated it! Add a baby and you probably feel like your there all the time because of all the additional loads you have to do. I'm sure you are being the best mom ever!
It gets better and it gets worse in it's own way too. You'll learn how to better handle her and yourself as time passes. And just as you think you've got it down, the baby will change and you have to figure it out all over again. I'm not trying to discourage you, just giving you a glimpse of my reality the last 14 months. And it pays to learn that some things just don't matter that much. Take care of Caroline and don't forget to take care of yourself as well. You'll be a better mother and wife if you give yourself some TLC as well, whatever that may be.
I just have to say...Moo. Hey, I've got all sorts of LOOOONGGG movies that are great that I could recommend to watch while nursing. Wives and Daughters. Pride and Prejudice. Nine hours of John Adams. Bleak House. North and South. Check them out. I'm telling you they're good. Maybe I'll have another baby so I can nurse and watch my favorite movies again (and have an excuse to not do my make up). :) You are doing an amazing job Sarah! Watching you, I'd think you'd been a mom forever. You are much more natural at it than I ever was.
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